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Showing All That Skin Will Not Help You Win

Tonight's post just might hit home for a lot of women reading this. To be honest with you, it hit home for myself as well. The title of tonight's blog does not insinuate that all we will be talking about is dressing half naked because we are going to get a little bit deeper. Just because you don't walk around half naked all of the time does not mean that you are out of the clearing here, if you do the infamous "show my booty to the camera" pose or make a point to show off your curves every chance that you get, this post applies to you too. I am going to give you a little background to tonights post and what has prompted me to write it.

When I was in high school I was known as the brown skin with the full lips and the fat a**. That's it. All of the boys would compliment me on my big butt but that's about all they would compliment me on and looking back on life now, that was nothing to be proud of. It didn't dawn on me that all I seemed to have going for myself for awhile was just my ASSets until I became sick. When I became sick I began to lose a lot of weight and I no longer had a fat a**. This is when I realized that guys were talking to me because of the junk I had in the trunk because when my booty size got smaller, so did the heart faces under my pictures.

What is the image that you portray on your social media? Are you constantly showing off your ASSets? Do you always make sure to remind your followers what you're working with? It's okay if you do just understand that this plays a huge role in why you might still be single. Yes, you might very well be a snack but what do people do with snacks? They eat them really quick, get their rush, and go about their business. Guys will treat you no different. You have to be soul food sis, not a snack. You might think all of that attention that you've gained from your skin tight leggings posts are positive but in actuality they aren't. Every guy that likes your pictures baring it all is basically saying to you, "I want to have sex with you". They like the image of you naked, not YOU.

You have to choose ONE. If you are going to show off your belly with your outfit, cover the rest of your body. If you are going to show off your legs, cover the rest of your body. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BARE IT ALL, LEAVE SOMETHING TO THE IMAGINATION. It's different when you are going to the club and you put your freakem dress on and take your picture. Every once in awhile it is okay to give folks a reminder of how you can step out but it's not necessary to remind folks every day that your body is A1, they know already.

I used to be that girl who did too much and then had the nerve to actually feel a way when guys were sliding in my DMs not talking about dates but talking about, "when we gone chill?". Don't get me wrong, guys know I have substance but when I went through my "thirst trap" stage that's exactly what I attracted, a bunch of extremely thirsty men who did not hide their intentions. Thankfully my substance outweighed my thirst trapping and I was still able to land a good man who saw more in me than the opportunity for me to throw it back but even still, now that I'm in a relationship, it is even more important that I am aware of the image I present to my audience.

Yes, I am a feminist and yes, I advocate for women doing WHAT THEY WANT , WHEN THEY WANT without fear of male opinion but at some point you must be honest with yourself and draw the line. You cannot keep throwing your booty at the camera and expecting guys to think that you aren't looking for attention. If you want to be seen as a woman of substance, ACT LIKE ONE. Naked pictures in the bathtub with your self timer are distasteful if you are not at a real live photoshoot getting PAID. There are some things you just don't have to do for the gram. Some women may not resonate with what I am saying and those women are in denial. But if you are a real one you will understand what I am saying and you will make the necessary changes in your life to attract the man that sees the woman you are past the ASSets. See you next Tuesday !

I love you,

Imani Blaize


Charlotte, NC, USA